the routine

My class started last week. the turnout has been pretty weak with only 11 or so of us here at one time out of the 30 or so that were signed up although i find it pretty typical. thinking about typicality makes me think about people's predictability especially people that you've come to get to know over longer periods of time. I always go through a phase where i tire of my friends as they seem to be in a rutt of sorts doing a whole lot of nothing just for the sake of passing the time until something meaningful comes along. that is not to say that i am not guilty of the same but when i step back and realize this i hate it and my mind becomes frantic with what ifs. what if i was more outgoing? what if i had a more widely appealing personality? what if i were to just stop being me all together and be come a full blown social chameleon who blended in with any group he was with not only in mentality but also appearance? my sense of individuality refuses this idea and becomes condecending of my thoughts. as such i resort to the solution i always do. rather than changing myself it may be time to change the people i have around me. i can only hope that i run into people that can help me make this so.

im tired of the overemotional, paranoid, and downright childish scenarios i hear from people as well as dealing with pathetic "victim of circumstance" types. until next time!

-CJ BISHES!

p.s. if by some chance a friend reads this don't be foolish and ask "is it i?" because if you do than yes...yes it is.